8 August, 2024 Arteles, Finland
MD Today is the 8th of August and it's 11:04 a.m. and we are at Artelese residency in Finland. And this is Melissa DeLaney. And I am joined by…
Julia: Julia Fernandez from Spain.
MD: Thank you. And this is our first session in the Conversations of Care series. And we're going to start with the first question, which is really broad. And I'd really like you to respond not so much about specifics like your name, but more broadly about your own impressions.
I'd like you to tell me who you are.
Julia: Well, um. Okay, I am Julia. I am a person who tries to discover herself and in the meantime I grow. In which it means the time passes that we measure that in years. Occidental years. Um. And also in the meantime, that in which the world changes and transforms culturally and socially. Mm. Yes. And a person who discovers herself in the things that she doesn't like and, and in the time that she can change or not. I don't know if that makes sense. Yeah. Yeah.
MD: Thank you. What is the first thing that comes into your mind when you think of care?Julia: The first thing that comes to my mind when I think of care is, the care of other people. Uh, family. Because of my background. Elder family. So people that they cannot do this in life. Like normal living, independent, independent living on their own. And then also it comes self care. But the first thing is Family care.
MD: So tell me more. There are two strands of care there that you're approaching. One is cultural and family care and your care for your family and your loved ones. And the other one is self care. So we'll start with the self care strand.
So for you what are some of the practices of self care that you you incorporate and use?
Julia: Well I think they can all bring to one type of self care which is time for me. Amazing time for listening to me. Or maybe not. Maybe that that is another way. Time for being with me. Maybe just not surrendering. Surrounded by other people or, uh. Yeah, Like the time for me. For choosing what I'm doing in that time. Maybe just doing nothing. Maybe just looking at the phone, but not like responding messages. Maybe reading, maybe meditating, maybe cleaning. But it's something that you don't have to make an effort to conversate or be in a certain way to someone else. You don't have to make that sometimes is an effort because you are not feeling well, so it's difficult to.
MD: And then. How does that self-care intersect with your responsibilities of care within your communities and family?
Julia: Well, that's been a journey. I have had to learn a lot, and I have had I have had to make my patience grow in order to to this, to course. These two concepts of care take place in the same time. Yeah.
MD: Thank you. And the next question is,
How would you like to see more care enacted in the future?
So in your future but also the future of the world. So we can start with the future of the world.
What is your vision of a world that is centered in care?
Julia: Well, as I see it, Um. Okay. How I wish it would be. Mhm. We have a system in communities that brings in architecture and how we develop cities so that they can contain all the people that need to be there and needing care in the same place, not like separate buildings and separate from each other. Like so it's easy to to be with people to take care of them. Yeah. And also in terms of community, because there are the people that need to be dependent, but also between neighbours.
I think we need more communal spaces. Not just like here at the residency, but also free spaces. Not that you have to pay to win the public spaces. That is like a whole thing for the architecture of the city. So that's, I think, what I wish to be the future is that we think of how we design cities and not just the cities, but also the country and how we build them, the places we live in in that sense of care.
I think that we go to the other side. I think that we are more individual, so we think more in separate ways instead of joining in community. So we have places to take care. We have places for reading, we have places to eat like it's all separated and we tend to be separate from each other because of capitalism.
Nature, nature.
So I think that we think on the wellbeing of the, for example, the elders, because we are like approaching an age that we didn't before. So we send our future beings and our new and our actual elders to other places. So I think we will develop those places to have more dignity each time. But I don't think I don't know if this is the best, if the development, if the development of places to care and house our elders is the best way for take care of them.
MD: Yeah.
Julia: Yeah, I don't know. But I think we are going that way.
MD: Do you think we are? Yes.
Julia: To develop like our elder life.
MD: Yeah. Yes. Thank you. So it's about community and communal responsibility and of the respect and care for people at all stages of their lives. And then how we all interact and support each other within urban and non-urban environments and infrastructure and systems to support those, those communal care systems. Yeah.
Julia: Now that you say that, I think that in terms of taking care of children. We tend to bring children to every place like, okay, this festival can bring children this, you know, because if not, young parents will feel they don't live well. Maybe it's a long conversation about this, but in the contrary, we don't bring elder people to public events / festival often. Yeah. You know. Yeah. We bring children, but not elders. Yeah. Like, we don't adapt the places for elder people. Yeah. Yeah.
MD: And I think it's about valuing everybody as well, isn't it. And seeing everybody has value at all different stages of their lives and bringing that back to community.
The other strand that you mentioned was around your self-care, and you talked about some of your practices that you do in your daily self-care practice.
How would you like to see the future of your self-care enacted?
And where where is that heading and what explorations, do you have in your mind and vision for yourself?
Julia: Well, um, yes, I think, more introspective practices like meditation, body care practices, like specific parts of body therapies. Yeah. Yes. Um, also, I think it's very important to schedule. I always find it's a challenge for me to schedule time in general. So that's why sometimes I forget to. It's difficult to make time for me to and to make a place in my daily life for me. Like, sometimes it's difficult because maybe you don't like what you see or I don't know why, but I always procrastinate that.
MD: Yeah, it's interesting about just that priority and what happens that overtakes in in daily life sometimes. Your own self-care drops out of the routine because you're kind of dragged into, other things going on. So you think you'll do it later, but then, yeah, later never comes.
Julia: But maybe it's like, um, how do you say … like a will that the less? For example, I know that meditation like this I brought from my psychotherapist. It helps me on my self-esteem. Yeah. So the less you work on your self-esteem or self-care, the less you are there, but then it's like it's a circle, you know? Like how? Well. And I put energy into therapy. That will be also a thing for me to as self-care like understanding myself makes me know more. When you know someone, you take care of that person, you love that person.
MD: Is therapy part of your self-care? As a part of your introspective self-inquiry and helping you to understand who you are.
Julia: Yes, totally. Because that also helps me to be more gentle with myself. Like when you when you speak with other people, not just therapy, you understand that it's not you. It's a general thing. Like we are humans, we are animals, so our behavior is always normal, like it's part of the brain cycles. So that makes me understand myself and that understanding, that is it doesn't happen just to me. It happens to other people. So I'm more compassionate with me and more patient with me.
MD: That's a very beautiful insight. Thank you so much. Julia.
Do you have anything to add before we close off our conversation?
Julia: Well, after this, I just thought about also when talking about women in history and that when we have reached out to talk between each other, that also is very helpful for us to discover that thing that we were not alone. That our problems were not just us, but it was a social problem. And that I and another woman have had the same problems. And I think this to be with my girlfriends, to have conversations with them, to be into feminism like great things on the internet and, you know, to be into feminism in terms of listening to other women and incorporating gender, gender, gender vision to my being. Yeah. To understand myself, that's really taking care of myself.
MD: That's gorgeous. I love that it's really important. Thank you so much. Thank you. I really appreciate your time and your beautiful insights. And thank you for contributing. Thank you.